Modern and changing weddings

Weddings are changing, and tradition changes with them. Civil, destination, elopement, mass, interfaith and same-sex weddings are all growing, and old customs are being reworked rather than abandoned. This page records the changes honestly, without assuming that new is better or that old is fixed.

Civil and small weddings

Many couples now marry at a registry office with a few witnesses, and hold a party later. Elopement to Las Vegas, Gretna Green or a beach has long been a choice and has seen a revival. Mass weddings, from Indian samuhik vivah to community weddings in the Gulf and in Pakistan, spare families the cost. In 2020 and 2021 the pandemic pushed many weddings online or into very small gatherings.

Marrying across lines

Interfaith and inter-community couples make decisions about which rites to hold, in which order, and who leads. Some hold two ceremonies, others a blended one. Same-sex marriage is legal in more than thirty countries, beginning with the Netherlands in 2001, and couples borrow from every tradition. In other countries same-sex couples cannot marry, and religious bodies differ on what they will bless.

Old customs, new meaning

Many couples drop customs they find unequal, such as the father giving away the bride, and keep ones they love, such as the henna night. Some communities have campaigns against dowry, child marriage and extravagant spending. Others work to preserve endangered crafts and songs. The result is a living tradition that keeps changing.