Modern and changing weddings
Civil, destination, elopement, mass, interfaith and same-sex weddings, and the old customs reworked.
Weddings are changing, and tradition changes with them. Civil, destination, elopement, mass, interfaith and same-sex weddings are all growing, and old customs are being reworked rather than abandoned. This page records the changes honestly, without assuming that new is better or that old is fixed.
Civil and small weddings
Many couples now marry at a registry office with a few witnesses, and hold a party later. Elopement to Las Vegas, Gretna Green or a beach has long been a choice and has seen a revival. Mass weddings, from Indian samuhik vivah to community weddings in the Gulf and in Pakistan, spare families the cost. In 2020 and 2021 the pandemic pushed many weddings online or into very small gatherings.
Marrying across lines
Interfaith and inter-community couples make decisions about which rites to hold, in which order, and who leads. Some hold two ceremonies, others a blended one. Same-sex marriage is legal in more than thirty countries, beginning with the Netherlands in 2001, and couples borrow from every tradition. In other countries same-sex couples cannot marry, and religious bodies differ on what they will bless.
Old customs, new meaning
Many couples drop customs they find unequal, such as the father giving away the bride, and keep ones they love, such as the henna night. Some communities have campaigns against dowry, child marriage and extravagant spending. Others work to preserve endangered crafts and songs. The result is a living tradition that keeps changing.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Modern and changing weddings (kind of custom). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇺🇸 United States and 2 moreNude wedding
A ceremony where the couple or guests participate without clothing.Modern · The ceremony
🇺🇸 New York, United States and 5 moreInterracial marriage
A union between spouses of different races or racialized ethnicities, now legal in most nations.Modern
🇺🇸 Hawaii, United StatesCommon-law marriage in the United States
A legal marriage formed without a licence or ceremony, in a few US jurisdictionsVow
🇺🇸 United States and 5 moreInterfaith marriage
A union between spouses of different faiths, navigating legal and religious boundaries across the world.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇺🇸 United States and 2 moreLavender marriage
A heterosexual union formed to hide the queer identity of one or both partners and protect a public career.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇨🇦 Toronto, CanadaSame-sex marriage in Canada
The legal recognition of marriage for same-sex couples across Canada since 2005.Modern
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Interfaith marriage in Christianity: Andreas Praefcke, CC BY 3.0, source
- Nude wedding: Peter Paul Rubens, Public domain, source
- Interracial marriage: Xavier Lejeune, CC BY 4.0, source
- Lavender marriage: Katharine Cornell and the Playwrights' Company; Vandamm Studio, photog, Public domain, source
- Same-sex marriage in Canada: Mm.Toronto, Public domain, source