The wedding feast
The stage and the toasts: who is served first, what is shared, what is thrown or broken.
After the ceremony comes the feast, the center of many weddings. It may be a sit-down banquet, a long buffet, a roast on a mat, or a table of small dishes. It is where the families celebrate together and where the toast, the cake and the first shared bite take place.
Order and honour
Seating is a message: the head table in the West, the stage in India where the couple receive guests, the separate men's and women's halls in many Muslim and Orthodox Jewish weddings. In Georgia the tamada leads toasts in a set order. In China the couple tours the tables with a drink, and in Ethiopia the couple feed each other in a gesture called gursha.
What is served
Menus carry meaning. A whole fish for abundance in China, a roast lamb in the Gulf, sugared almonds in Italy, jollof rice in Nigeria and Ghana, biryani in India and Pakistan, tagine and pastilla in Morocco, and a cake in Britain. Sweet dishes are especially common, from the Greek koufeta to the Persian sholeh zard.
What is changing
Food stations, plant-based menus and halal or kosher catering are growing, and many couples work with local cooks rather than chains. Some communities cap the guest list or the menu to control spending, as in a few Gulf and Indian states.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on The wedding feast (stage of the wedding). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
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Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Umtsimba: Cat7624, CC0, source
- Badchen: Unknown author, Public domain, source
- Tahtib: Yasser Elrasoul, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Lithuanian wedding songs: Gailė Paštukaitė, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Marriage in Myanmar: Thant Zin Myint, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Imilchil Marriage Festival: Zakaria ElQotbi, CC BY 2.0, source
- Aso ebi: SUPREME LACE, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Jewish wedding: Jozef Israëls, Public domain, source
- Arab wedding: 13th century artist, Public domain, source