Wedding traditions with wine and the shared cup
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared.
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared. It appears in the Jewish seven blessings, in Orthodox services, in Japanese weddings with sake, in Chinese customs with the wedding cup and in many African customs with palm wine.
The shared cup
In the Jewish wedding the couple drink from the same cup after the blessings. In Orthodox weddings the common cup is shared, sipped three times. In Japan the san-san-kudo has the couple drink sake from three cups. In China the couple link arms to drink from two cups tied with red thread, the jiaobei jiu. In Igbo weddings the bride finds her husband with a cup of palm wine and gives it to him to drink.
The toast
The toast to the couple is almost universal. Georgian weddings have the tamada, Irish weddings have a speech, and in Poland guests shout gorzko, bitter, until the couple kiss to sweeten it. Many weddings avoid alcohol, and non-alcoholic cups hold the same meaning.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Wine and the shared cup (symbol). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
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Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Jewish wedding: Jozef Israëls, Public domain, source
- Seudat mitzvah: Unknown author, Public domain, source
- Sheva Brachot: מנחם יוסיפון, CC0, source
- Dabke: Sarah Canbel, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Assyrian wedding: Yucalyptus, CC0, source
- Erusin: LGJMS, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Chuppah: me, Public domain, source
- Mystery of Crowning: Shakko, CC BY-SA 3.0, source