Wedding traditions with wine and the shared cup
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared.
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared. It appears in the Jewish seven blessings, in Orthodox services, in Japanese weddings with sake, in Chinese customs with the wedding cup and in many African customs with palm wine.
The shared cup
In the Jewish wedding the couple drink from the same cup after the blessings. In Orthodox weddings the common cup is shared, sipped three times. In Japan the san-san-kudo has the couple drink sake from three cups. In China the couple link arms to drink from two cups tied with red thread, the jiaobei jiu. In Igbo weddings the bride finds her husband with a cup of palm wine and gives it to him to drink.
The toast
The toast to the couple is almost universal. Georgian weddings have the tamada, Irish weddings have a speech, and in Poland guests shout gorzko, bitter, until the couple kiss to sweeten it. Many weddings avoid alcohol, and non-alcoholic cups hold the same meaning.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Wine and the shared cup (symbol). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇮🇳 IndiaIndian wedding invitationsNimantraṇa patra (निमन्त्रण पत्र)
Decorated cards sent to announce a marriage and invite guests to the celebration.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇨🇦 CanadaStag and doe
A Canadian fundraiser where guests pay to help the couple cover wedding costs.Feast custom · Engagement and betrothal
🇺🇸 Las Vegas, United States and 5 moreBachelor party
A final celebration for the groom before his wedding, with names and customs varying by region.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇦🇿 AzerbaijanAzerbaijani wedding traditionsAzərbaycanın toy adətləri
The multi-step family rituals of Azerbaijani weddings, from matchmaking to the henna night.Rite · Finding a match
🇸🇾 Syria and 3 moreAssyrian wedding
Marriage ceremonies blending ancient Assyrian rites with modern cultural practices among the Assyrian people.Rite · Finding a match
🇻🇳 VietnamTraditional Vietnamese weddingLễ cưới truyền thống Việt Nam
The multi-stage ceremony of betrothal, engagement and union that marks a marriage in Vietnam.Attire · Finding a match
🇸🇿 EswatiniUmtsimbauntsimba
A multi-day Swazi wedding procession where the bride joins her husband's family through ritualised stages.Rite · Finding a match
🇧🇩 Bangladesh and 1 moreBengali Muslim weddingবাঙালি মুসলিম বিয়ে
A multi-day Bengali Muslim marriage blending Islamic rites with local folk traditions.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaMeitei weddingLuhongba (ꯂꯨꯍꯣꯡꯕ)
The traditional union of the Meitei people, marked by clan exogamy and specific courtship rituals.Rite · Finding a match
🇪🇬 Egypt and 5 moreArab weddingزفاف or فرح or عرس
A series of family-centered rites and processions that mark marriage across the Arab world.Rite · Finding a match
🇬🇷 Greece and 1 moreAnastenariaΑναστενάρια (Greek), Нестинарство (Bulgarian)
A barefoot firewalking ritual performed by Orthodox Christian communities in Greece and Bulgaria.Rite · The weeks before
🇺🇦 Ukraine and 7 moreVechornytsiвечорниці
A Ukrainian courtship gathering where young people meet, dance and practice matchmaking rituals before the wedding seasoBetrothal · The weeks before
🇵🇭 Cebu, PhilippinesCourtship in the Philippines
A traditional Filipino courtship marked by serenade, service, and family involvement.Betrothal · Finding a match
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Courtship in the Philippines: Markytour777, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Indian wedding invitations: Onef9day, CC BY 3.0, source
- Bachelor party: Derek Springer, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Azerbaijani wedding traditions: Azim Azimzadeh, Public domain, source
- Assyrian wedding: Yucalyptus, CC0, source
- Vechornytsi: Гейслер, Кристиан Готфрид Генрих, Public domain, source
- Meitei wedding: Dabu Leichombam, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Arab wedding: 13th century artist, Public domain, source
- Traditional Vietnamese wedding: Gabrielle M. Vassal, Public domain, source
- Umtsimba: Cat7624, CC0, source
- Bengali Muslim wedding: NahidSultan, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Anastenaria: Artkostov, CC BY-SA 4.0, source