Vows, contracts and registration: wedding traditions from every country

Vows, contracts and registration are the promise and the paperwork: what is said aloud, what is signed, who witnesses it and which authority records it. In some weddings the contract is the heart of the day, as with the nikah and the ketubah. In others the civil register is a separate visit with a separate dress.

The spoken promise

A Christian service uses set vows, such as the Book of Common Prayer's promise to have and to hold, though many couples now choose their own. A Hindu wedding has the saptapadi, in which each step is paired with a pledge about food, strength, prosperity, family, children and friendship. Sikh couples circle the Guru Granth Sahib four times during the lavan. A Quaker couple speaks directly to each other without a priest. Among Jews the groom says the formula under the canopy, and the bride accepts the ring.

The written contract

The ketubah, the nikah nama and the Zoroastrian marriage certificate are agreements with real terms: the ketubah sets out the husband's obligations to his wife, and the nikah contract records the mahr, the gift owed to the bride, along with any conditions she has added. Many Muslim women now use the contract to write in rights about work, residence and divorce. In Christian and civil weddings the register is signed by the couple and two witnesses, and the registrar then files it with the state.

Law and the faith side by side

In England and Wales a religious ceremony must usually be registered, and many mosque and temple weddings have historically lacked legal recognition, which leaves some women without protection. Countries such as Germany and France require a civil wedding first, with any religious service after. Others, such as Israel and Lebanon, have no civil marriage at home, so couples fly to Cyprus. Reform of these rules is a live issue in many places.

About this page

Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Vows, contracts and registration (kind of custom). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.

Photo credits on this page

The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.

Sealing (Mormonism): NewNameNoah, CC BY 4.0, source

Interfaith marriage in Christianity: Andreas Praefcke, CC BY 3.0, source

Pre-Cana: Jebulon, CC0, source

Same-sex marriage in Illinois: nathanmac87, CC BY 2.0, source

Same-sex marriage in the District of Columbia: Nate Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0, source

Lavender marriage: Katharine Cornell and the Playwrights' Company; Vandamm Studio, photog, Public domain, source

Mormon polygamy: Charles Weitfle, Public domain, source

Same-sex marriage and Judaism: Ed and Eddie, CC BY-SA 2.0, source

Interracial marriage: Xavier Lejeune, CC BY 4.0, source

Marriage proposal: Victorgrigas, CC BY-SA 3.0, source

Loyal toast: Alaxander W. Galbraith, Public domain, source

Engagement ring: Photo by Derek Ramsey ( Ram-Man ), CC BY-SA 2.5, source

Las Vegas weddings: Henrickson ( talk ) ( Uploads ), CC BY-SA 3.0, source