Feasts, food and drink
The customs of the wedding table: the cake, the sweets, the toast, the shared cup. Not recipes.
The wedding feast is where the families meet at one table. Who is served first, what is shared, what is toasted and what is broken or cut are all customs with meaning. Food at a wedding is an act of hospitality and a display of generosity, and the way it is served says much about who the hosts are.
Shared foods and the first bite
In Poland the couple are greeted with bread and salt and a glass of vodka. In Georgia a tamada, the toastmaster, directs a long sequence of toasts. In Armenia and Turkey the couple may share a sweet drink or a sugar cube. In Chinese banquets a whole fish is served for abundance, and the couple go table to table for toasts. In Indian weddings the thali or the long sit-down meal comes after the ceremony, and in the Gulf a whole roast lamb on rice may be the centrepiece.
Cake and sweets
The tiered wedding cake in Britain and the United States has its roots in the Victorian era and in older bride cakes and cakes broken over the bride's head. In Sweden and Denmark a tall kransekage is built from rings of almond paste. In Iran and India, sweets such as shirini and mithai are exchanged at the first betrothal. In France the croquembouche, a tower of cream puffs, is the traditional dessert.
Drink and restraint
Wine, champagne, mead and palm wine appear in many weddings, and the Orthodox common cup is a shared symbol. Many Muslim, Sikh, Jain and Hindu weddings are alcohol free, and non-alcoholic drinks like sherbet, lassi and fruit juice are served with equal care. Hosts increasingly cater for dietary needs and think about food waste.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Feasts, food and drink (kind of custom). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇮🇳 Chandigarh, IndiaBhangra
A vigorous Punjabi folk dance performed to the beat of a dhol drum during harvest celebrations.Performance · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇳 IndiaTulasi Vivahतुलसी विवाह (Tulasī Vivāha)
A symbolic Hindu wedding uniting the holy basil plant with a stone representing Vishnu.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreAlpanaআলপনা (Bengali)
Rice flour floor paintings that bless homes and mark wedding celebrations in Bengal.Adornment · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaOppanaഒപ്പന
A circle dance and song tradition of the Mappila Muslim community in Kerala weddingsPerformance · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇳 India and 2 moreMandapaमण्डप (maṇḍapa)
The pillared pavilion that serves as the stage for Hindu wedding rituals and temple gatherings.Setting · The ceremony
🇮🇳 IndiaChaklong wedding
The traditional Ahom marriage system involving rice powder mandalas and ancestral rituals.Rite · Finding a match
🇮🇳 IndiaMehndi
The henna body art applied to brides and guests before a South Asian wedding ceremony.Adornment · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaAyyavazhi wedding
The sacred rite of Ayyavazhi that treats marriage as a spiritual sacrament and family life as the highest austerity.Rite · Procession and arrival
🇮🇳 IndiaHindi wedding songs
Film and folk music that accompanies the stages of a North Indian Hindu wedding.Performance · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇳 IndiaOdia Hindu weddingBahaghara (ଓଡ଼ିଆ ବାହାଘର)
The traditional Hindu marriage ceremony of the Odia people in Odisha, India.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇳 Goa, IndiaHaldi Kumkum
A gathering of married women in southern India who exchange turmeric and vermilion to celebrate their status.Blessing
🇮🇳 IndiaTelugu Hindu weddingతెలుగు వివాహ వేడుక
A multi-day Telugu Hindu marriage marked by seven vows around fire and family rituals.Rite · Finding a match
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreAiburo Bhaatআইবুড়ো ভাত
The final bachelor feast for the bride and groom before their Bengali weddingFeast custom · The weeks before
🇧🇩 Bangladesh and 1 moreBengali Muslim weddingবাঙালি মুসলিম বিয়ে
A multi-day Bengali Muslim marriage blending Islamic rites with local folk traditions.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaZoroastrian wedding
A Zoroastrian marriage ceremony featuring hand-fastening, rice sprinkling, and shared meals.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇧🇩 Bangladesh and 1 moreBou Bhatবউ ভাত
A feast hosted by the groom's family to welcome the bride into her new home.Feast custom · After the wedding
🇳🇵 Nepal and 2 moreKhata
A ceremonial scarf offered to show respect and welcome at weddings and other gatherings in Tibet and Nepal.Adornment · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreYajnaयज्ञ (Yajña)
A sacred fire ritual central to Hindu weddings and other rites of passageRite · The ceremony
🇮🇳 Madurai, IndiaGoluBommai kolu (Tamil), Bommala Koluvu (Telugu), Gombe Habba (Kannada)
A tiered display of dolls and figurines arranged in South Indian homes during the Navaratri festival.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreLuddi
A circle dance of Punjab performed at weddings and celebrations by men and women.Performance · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇳 Ahmedabad, India and 1 moreGarba
A circle dance from Gujarat performed around a sacred flame during the Navaratri festival.Performance · The weeks before
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Mehndi: AKS.9955, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Ayyavazhi wedding: Vaikunda Raja, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Yajna: Chainwit., CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Garba: anurag agnihotri, CC BY 2.0, source
- Chaklong wedding: Chiring chandan, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Odia Hindu wedding: Aditya Mahar, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Tulasi Vivah: Unknown author, CC BY 3.0, source
- Alpana: Tripan123, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Golu: Ksiva21, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Oppana: Shagil Kannur, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Bhangra: Jimmysekhon25, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Khata: Wiki-uk, CC BY 3.0, source
- Aiburo Bhaat: Ranganm2021, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Bengali Muslim wedding: NahidSultan, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Mandapa: Rajendran Ganesan, CC BY 2.0, source