Wedding traditions with wine and the shared cup
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared.
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared. It appears in the Jewish seven blessings, in Orthodox services, in Japanese weddings with sake, in Chinese customs with the wedding cup and in many African customs with palm wine.
The shared cup
In the Jewish wedding the couple drink from the same cup after the blessings. In Orthodox weddings the common cup is shared, sipped three times. In Japan the san-san-kudo has the couple drink sake from three cups. In China the couple link arms to drink from two cups tied with red thread, the jiaobei jiu. In Igbo weddings the bride finds her husband with a cup of palm wine and gives it to him to drink.
The toast
The toast to the couple is almost universal. Georgian weddings have the tamada, Irish weddings have a speech, and in Poland guests shout gorzko, bitter, until the couple kiss to sweeten it. Many weddings avoid alcohol, and non-alcoholic cups hold the same meaning.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Wine and the shared cup (symbol). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇬🇪 Georgia and 1 moreTamadaთამადა
The toastmaster who leads the Georgian supra and sets the rhythm of a wedding feast.Feast custom · The wedding feast
🇩🇰 Copenhagen, Denmark and 2 moreKransekakekransekage
A towering almond ring cake central to Scandinavian wedding and holiday traditions.Feast custom · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇱 IsraelSeudat nissuinSeudat nissuin (סעודת נישואין)
The Jewish wedding meal blessed with wine and bread, followed by seven days of celebration.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇱🇦 Laos and 1 moreBaciບາສີ (Lao); บายศรี (Thai)
The wrist-tying ceremony that calls the soul back to restore balance and good luck.Blessing · The ceremony
🇷🇺 RussiaEastern Orthodox marriage
The Byzantine Rite ceremony where a priest crowns the couple to seal their union in Christ.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇱 Israel and 2 moreSheva Brachotשבע ברכות
The seven blessings recited during Jewish weddings and the subsequent festive week.Blessing · The ceremony
🇩🇪 Germany and 5 morePolterabend
The evening before the wedding when guests break porcelain to bring luck and test the couple's teamwork.Blessing · The eve
🇨🇳 ChinaJiaobeijiu交杯酒
The ancient Chinese rite of sharing wine from linked cups to seal a marriage.Rite · The ceremony
🇨🇳 China and 3 moreMarriage coin charm夫妇和合花钱 (fū fù hé hé huā qián)
Numismatic amulets from East Asia that carry wedding blessings and fertility symbols.Adornment · Engagement and betrothal
🇰🇷 South Korea and 1 morePyebaek폐백
A Korean post-ceremony ritual where the couple bows to the groom's parents and shares symbolic foods.Blessing · After the wedding
🇮🇱 Israel and 3 moreChuppahחֻפָּה (ḥuppā)
The four-poster canopy that marks the Jewish wedding ceremony and symbolizes the couple's new home.Setting · The ceremony
🇸🇾 Syria and 3 moreMystery of Crowning
The crowning ritual in Eastern Christian weddings that marks the couple as king and queen.Rite · The ceremony
🇵🇱 Kraków, PolandWedding of the Weddings
A Polish annual gathering for couples who chose alcohol-free wedding receptions.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇬🇷 Greece and 1 moreAnastenariaΑναστενάρια (Greek), Нестинарство (Bulgarian)
A barefoot firewalking ritual performed by Orthodox Christian communities in Greece and Bulgaria.Rite · The weeks before
🇳🇴 NorwayEsbat
A monthly Wiccan gathering held around the moon phases for ritual and communityBlessing · The ceremony
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Polterabend: 4028mdk09, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Baci: Dalbera, CC BY 2.0, source
- Eastern Orthodox marriage: VitVit, CC BY 3.0, source
- Tamada: Niko Pirosmani, Public domain, source
- Kransekake: Kjetil Ree, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Sheva Brachot: מנחם יוסיפון, CC0, source
- Marriage coin charm: Scott Semans, CC BY 3.0, source
- Pyebaek: halfGoku, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Anastenaria: Artkostov, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Chuppah: me, Public domain, source
- Mystery of Crowning: Shakko, CC BY-SA 3.0, source