Wedding traditions with wine and the shared cup
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared.
A cup of wine or a shared drink is a promise that two lives will be shared. It appears in the Jewish seven blessings, in Orthodox services, in Japanese weddings with sake, in Chinese customs with the wedding cup and in many African customs with palm wine.
The shared cup
In the Jewish wedding the couple drink from the same cup after the blessings. In Orthodox weddings the common cup is shared, sipped three times. In Japan the san-san-kudo has the couple drink sake from three cups. In China the couple link arms to drink from two cups tied with red thread, the jiaobei jiu. In Igbo weddings the bride finds her husband with a cup of palm wine and gives it to him to drink.
The toast
The toast to the couple is almost universal. Georgian weddings have the tamada, Irish weddings have a speech, and in Poland guests shout gorzko, bitter, until the couple kiss to sweeten it. Many weddings avoid alcohol, and non-alcoholic cups hold the same meaning.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Wine and the shared cup (symbol). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇬🇧 United KingdomQuaichcuach
A shallow two-handled cup used in Scottish weddings to share a drink and symbolise union.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇵🇸 Ramallah, Palestine and 4 moreDabkeدبكة
A Levantine line dance performed at weddings to celebrate union and community.Performance · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇱 IsraelSeudat nissuinSeudat nissuin (סעודת נישואין)
The Jewish wedding meal blessed with wine and bread, followed by seven days of celebration.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇩🇰 Copenhagen, Denmark and 2 moreKransekakekransekage
A towering almond ring cake central to Scandinavian wedding and holiday traditions.Feast custom · Reception, dance and gifts
🇬🇪 Georgia and 1 moreTamadaთამადა
The toastmaster who leads the Georgian supra and sets the rhythm of a wedding feast.Feast custom · The wedding feast
🇮🇱 Jerusalem, Israel and 3 moreJewish wedding
The ceremony and laws that bind a couple in Jewish marriage, from the canopy to the glass.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇸🇿 EswatiniUmtsimbauntsimba
A multi-day Swazi wedding procession where the bride joins her husband's family through ritualised stages.Rite · Finding a match
🇧🇩 Bangladesh and 1 moreBengali Muslim weddingবাঙালি মুসলিম বিয়ে
A multi-day Bengali Muslim marriage blending Islamic rites with local folk traditions.Rite · The weeks before
🇪🇬 Egypt and 5 moreArab weddingزفاف or فرح or عرس
A series of family-centered rites and processions that mark marriage across the Arab world.Rite · Finding a match
🇲🇽 Oaxaca, MexicoOaxacan wedding
A multi-day Catholic celebration in Oaxaca featuring mole, mezcal, and communal dancing.Feast custom · Engagement and betrothal
🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 1 moreWedding breakfast
The post-ceremony feast served to the couple and their guests in British English usage.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇷🇺 RussiaRussian wedding traditionsРусская свадьба
A multi-day celebration blending Orthodox crowning, ransom games, and lively toasting in Russia.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇷🇺 RussiaLoving cup
A large shared drinking vessel with two handles used in Christian rites and weddingsFeast custom · The wedding feast
🇨🇦 CanadaStag and doe
A Canadian fundraiser where guests pay to help the couple cover wedding costs.Feast custom · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇸 IcelandIcelandic weddings
A blend of church ceremony and multi-day feasting that marks the union of two people in Iceland.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇮🇱 Israel and 2 moreSheva Brachotשבע ברכות
The seven blessings recited during Jewish weddings and the subsequent festive week.Blessing · The ceremony
🇻🇳 VietnamTraditional Vietnamese weddingLễ cưới truyền thống Việt Nam
The multi-stage ceremony of betrothal, engagement and union that marks a marriage in Vietnam.Attire · Finding a match
🇰🇷 South Korea and 1 morePyebaek폐백
A Korean post-ceremony ritual where the couple bows to the groom's parents and shares symbolic foods.Blessing · After the wedding
🇺🇸 Las Vegas, United States and 5 moreBachelor party
A final celebration for the groom before his wedding, with names and customs varying by region.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇵🇱 Kraków, PolandWedding of the Weddings
A Polish annual gathering for couples who chose alcohol-free wedding receptions.Feast custom · The ceremony
🇺🇦 Ukraine and 7 moreVechornytsiвечорниці
A Ukrainian courtship gathering where young people meet, dance and practice matchmaking rituals before the wedding seasoBetrothal · The weeks before
🇩🇪 GermanyLandshut WeddingLandshuter Hochzeit
A four-year historical pageant in Bavaria re-enacting the 1475 royal marriage of George and Hedwig.Setting · Engagement and betrothal
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Dabke: Sarah Canbel, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Umtsimba: Cat7624, CC0, source
- Russian wedding traditions: GeorgeLouis, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Bengali Muslim wedding: NahidSultan, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Quaich: Robin-wood, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Wedding breakfast: Arpingstone, Public domain, source
- Tamada: Niko Pirosmani, Public domain, source
- Landshut Wedding: Oktobersonne, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Kransekake: Kjetil Ree, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Loving cup: Rhodian at English Wikipedia, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Jewish wedding: Jozef Israëls, Public domain, source
- Sheva Brachot: מנחם יוסיפון, CC0, source
- Traditional Vietnamese wedding: Gabrielle M. Vassal, Public domain, source
- Pyebaek: halfGoku, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Bachelor party: Derek Springer, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Arab wedding: 13th century artist, Public domain, source
- Oaxacan wedding: Adam Jones, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Vechornytsi: Гейслер, Кристиан Готфрид Генрих, Public domain, source