Vows, contracts and registration
The promise and the paperwork: the nikah contract, the ketubah, the register, the witnesses.
Vows, contracts and registration are the promise and the paperwork: what is said aloud, what is signed, who witnesses it and which authority records it. In some weddings the contract is the heart of the day, as with the nikah and the ketubah. In others the civil register is a separate visit with a separate dress.
The spoken promise
A Christian service uses set vows, such as the Book of Common Prayer's promise to have and to hold, though many couples now choose their own. A Hindu wedding has the saptapadi, in which each step is paired with a pledge about food, strength, prosperity, family, children and friendship. Sikh couples circle the Guru Granth Sahib four times during the lavan. A Quaker couple speaks directly to each other without a priest. Among Jews the groom says the formula under the canopy, and the bride accepts the ring.
The written contract
The ketubah, the nikah nama and the Zoroastrian marriage certificate are agreements with real terms: the ketubah sets out the husband's obligations to his wife, and the nikah contract records the mahr, the gift owed to the bride, along with any conditions she has added. Many Muslim women now use the contract to write in rights about work, residence and divorce. In Christian and civil weddings the register is signed by the couple and two witnesses, and the registrar then files it with the state.
Law and the faith side by side
In England and Wales a religious ceremony must usually be registered, and many mosque and temple weddings have historically lacked legal recognition, which leaves some women without protection. Countries such as Germany and France require a civil wedding first, with any religious service after. Others, such as Israel and Lebanon, have no civil marriage at home, so couples fly to Cyprus. Reform of these rules is a live issue in many places.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on Vows, contracts and registration (kind of custom). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇿🇦 South AfricaPolygamy in South Africa
The practice of men marrying more than one wife under customary and Islamic law in South Africa.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇱 Israel and 1 moreLieberman clause
A ketubah provision for rabbinic arbitration to prevent a woman from being unable to remarry.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇳🇿 Wellington, New ZealandMarriage (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Act 2013
The 2013 New Zealand law that changed the legal definition of marriage to include same-sex couples.Vow · The weeks before
🇦🇺 Australia and 5 moreCelebrancy
A profession of secular officiants who create personalised life ceremonies for people outside traditional religious or sModern · The weeks before
🇮🇱 Tel Aviv, IsraelUnregistered cohabitation in Israel
Legal recognition for same-sex couples living together without a formal religious or civil wedding ceremony.Modern
🇺🇿 UzbekistanPolygamy in Uzbekistan
The practice of men taking multiple wives in a country where the law strictly forbids it.Modern · Engagement and betrothal
🇱🇮 Vaduz, LiechtensteinSame-sex marriage in Liechtenstein
The civil union that grants equal marital rights to all couples in the Alpine principality.Modern · The ceremony
🇰🇷 Seoul, South KoreaRecognition of same-sex unions in South Korea
The ongoing legal and political struggle to recognize same-sex marriages and civil unions in South Korea.Modern
🇲🇪 Podgorica, MontenegroRecognition of same-sex unions in MontenegroŽivotno partnerstvo
Legal recognition for same-sex couples in Montenegro through life partnerships.Modern
🇵🇰 Lahore, Pakistan and 1 morePolygamy in Pakistan
The legal allowance for Muslim men to have up to four wives under Pakistani law.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇳🇿 Wellington, New ZealandCivil union in New Zealand
A legal partnership for same-sex and opposite-sex couples established by statute in New Zealand.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇰🇭 Phnom Penh, CambodiaSame-sex marriage in Cambodia
The legal status and local registry for same-sex couples in Cambodia.Modern · Engagement and betrothal
🇳🇿 New ZealandPolygamy in New Zealand
The legal prohibition of multiple spouses and the limited recognition of foreign polygamous unions.Vow
🇺🇬 UgandaRecognition of same-sex unions in Uganda
The legal status of same-sex marriage and civil unions under Ugandan law.Modern
🇪🇸 SpainRoyal Pragmatic on MarriageReal Pragmática
A Spanish law requiring parental permission for marriage to enforce social class boundaries.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇻🇪 Caracas, VenezuelaSame-sex marriage in Venezuela
The ongoing legal and social effort to recognize same-sex marriages and civil partnerships in Venezuela.Modern
🇱🇰 Kandy, Sri LankaPolygamy in Sri Lanka
The historical and current legal status of multiple marriages under Kandyan and Muslim law.Vow
🇮🇩 IndonesiaSame-sex marriage in Indonesia
The legal status and social reality of same-sex unions under Indonesian law.Modern · The ceremony
🇲🇨 Monaco, MonacoRecognition of same-sex unions in Monacocontrat de vie commune; union civile
Legal frameworks for same-sex couples in Monaco, from cohabitation agreements to ongoing civil union debates.Modern · Engagement and betrothal
🇸🇷 SurinameRecognition of same-sex unions in Suriname
The legal status of same-sex marriage and civil partnerships in Suriname.Modern
🇪🇸 A Coruña, Spain and 2 moreFirst same-sex marriage in Spain
The 1901 union of two women in Galicia that preceded legal recognition by over a centuryModern · The ceremony
🇨🇴 Bogotá, ColombiaSame-sex marriage in Colombia
The legal recognition of same-sex unions established by the Constitutional Court in 2016.Modern · The ceremony
🇳🇬 Kano, NigeriaPolygamy in Nigeria
A marital practice where men take multiple wives, legally recognized in twelve northern states under Sharia law.Family role · Engagement and betrothal
🇨🇦 CanadaCivil union in Quebec
A legal partnership in Quebec that grants same rights to opposite and same-sex couples as marriage.Vow · Engagement and betrothal
🇿🇦 South AfricaProhibition of Mixed Marriages Act, 1949
An apartheid-era law in South Africa that banned marriages between white and non-white citizens.Modern
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Polygamy in South Africa: Unknown author, CC BY 4.0, source
- Recognition of same-sex unions in South Korea: Nerd271, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Civil union in New Zealand: Helen Robinson, CC BY-SA 2.5, source
- First same-sex marriage in Spain: Jglamela, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Same-sex marriage in Colombia: Diego Cambiaso, CC BY-SA 2.0, source