The weeks before
Invitations, the trousseau, the bridal shower, the bachelor night and the purifying baths.
The weeks before a wedding are a time of preparation: invitations, tailoring, shopping, cleaning the house, cooking and gathering family. Many cultures have rites in this period, from the bridal shower to purifying baths, and they are often held among women or among friends.
Invitations and gifts
Invitations range from printed cards to the traditional Indian practice of first inviting the deity Ganesha and then the family in person with sweets. In Ethiopia and many Arab families, relatives are invited verbally and in person. In parts of China, the groom's family sends cakes and tea to relatives. The trousseau is assembled, and in India and Pakistan a shopping trip for gold, cloth and gifts may take weeks.
Showers, stag nights and baths
Western brides may have a hen party and a bridal shower, and grooms a bachelor party or stag night. In Morocco and the Levant the bride visits the hammam with female relatives for a ritual bath. In Hindu tradition haldi and oil are applied. In Scotland the bride's friends may have a kitchen tea, and in Poland the panieński, the maiden evening, is held before the wedding.
What is changing
Pre-wedding events have expanded, with engagement shoots, destination bachelorette trips and multi-day celebrations. Many families now plan with shared online documents. Others scale back because of cost and keep only the core rite.
About this page
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on The weeks before (stage of the wedding). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇪🇬 Cairo, EgyptTahtibتحطيب (taḥṭīb)
A traditional Egyptian stick-fighting martial art that evolved into a folk dance performed at weddings and celebrations.Performance · The weeks before
🇳🇬 Lagos, Nigeria and 3 moreAso ebiAsọ-Ẹbí
Matching outfits worn by groups to show solidarity at Yoruba weddings and other ceremoniesAttire · The weeks before
🇳🇪 In-Gall, Niger and 2 moreGuérewol
A week-long courtship dance where Wodaabe men display their beauty to win the attention of marriageable women.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaWanvun
A Kashmiri choral singing style performed before weddings and religious ritesPerformance · The weeks before
🇿🇦 South AfricaUmemulo
The Zulu coming of age ceremony that marks a woman as ready for marriageRite · The weeks before
🇮🇹 ItalyFescennine VersesFescennina carmina
Bawdy wedding songs from Ancient Rome that evolved into satire and comic drama.Performance · Engagement and betrothal
🇬🇷 Athens, GreeceLoutrophorosλουτροφόρος
An ancient Greek vessel that carried water for a bride's bath or marked an unmarried death.Attire · The weeks before
🇳🇬 Nigeria and 2 moreGeleGèlè
The towering Yoruba head tie that crowns the bride and marks her status on the wedding day.Attire · The weeks before
🇮🇩 Indonesia and 2 moreKenduri
A communal feast and prayer gathering held by Javanese and Malay communities to mark life events.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇩🇪 Hamburg, Germany and 3 moreWimpelווימפל
A linen sash made from a baby boy's circumcision cloth that binds the Torah scroll.Adornment · The weeks before
🇬🇧 United KingdomGift registry
A public wish list managed by retailers to coordinate wedding gifts and prevent duplicates.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇮🇳 Kochi, IndiaKasavuകസാവ്
The white cotton and gold border attire worn by Malayalis for weddings and festivals.Attire · The weeks before
🇮🇹 Rome, ItalyWeddings in ancient Rome
The religious ceremonies and attire that marked a union in the city of Rome before the rise of Christianity.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇱 Jerusalem, IsraelTu B'Avט״ו באב
A minor Jewish holiday in Israel that serves as a popular day for weddings and matchmaking.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇺🇦 Ukraine and 2 moreRushnykрушник (Ukrainian), ручнік (Belarusian), ручник/рушник (Russian)
The embroidered linen cloth that marks life stages and guides the couple through the wedding ceremony in East Slavic culAdornment · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaTulasi Vivahतुलसी विवाह (Tulasī Vivāha)
A symbolic Hindu wedding uniting the holy basil plant with a stone representing Vishnu.Rite · The weeks before
🇪🇹 Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and 1 moreZuria
The ankle-length dress with woven hem bands worn by Tigrinya and Amhara women for weddings and holidays.Attire · The weeks before
🇮🇩 Jakarta, IndonesiaPalang pintu
The martial arts and poetry test that allows the groom to enter the bride's home in Betawi weddings.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaOppanaഒപ്പന
A circle dance and song tradition of the Mappila Muslim community in Kerala weddingsPerformance · Engagement and betrothal
🇧🇷 Brazil and 1 moreDia dos Namorados
Brazil's June 12 celebration of romance, held on the eve of Saint Anthony's feast day.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇰🇷 South KoreaBlack DayBlack Day (Korean: 블랙데이)
A South Korean day for singles to gather and eat black bean noodles after missing Valentine's and White Day gifts.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇲🇽 Oaxaca, Mexico and 1 moreHuipilhuīpīlli
The traditional tunic worn by indigenous women in Mexico and Central America for weddings and daily life.Attire · The weeks before
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreAlpanaআলপনা (Bengali)
Rice flour floor paintings that bless homes and mark wedding celebrations in Bengal.Adornment · The weeks before
🇪🇸 Spain and 4 moreMantilla
A lace or silk veil worn over the head and shoulders by women in Spain and Latin AmericaAttire · The weeks before
🇵🇰 Hunza, PakistanMayoon
A pre-wedding seclusion period in Pakistan where the bride stays away from her groom for up to two weeks.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇯🇵 Tokyo, JapanMizuhiki水引
The knotted paper cord that adorns Japanese wedding gifts and envelopesAdornment · Engagement and betrothal
🇲🇾 Malaysia and 4 moreBaju Kurungباجو كوروڠ
The traditional blouse and skirt worn by Malay women for weddings and religious ceremoniesAttire · The weeks before
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreMaithil Vivahमैथिल विवाह
The arranged Hindu marriage of Maithils in the Mithila region, guided by Vedic texts and local customs.Betrothal · Finding a match
🇲🇱 MaliWeddings in Mali
Multi-day Malian wedding traditions blending Islamic rites, civil law, and local customs with bazin attire.Rite · Engagement and betrothal
🇪🇬 Egypt and 3 moreZaffaزفّة
A lively musical procession that marks the start of wedding festivities in Arab culture.Performance · The weeks before
🇹🇭 Thailand and 5 moreBride price
Wealth paid by the groom or his family to the bride or her kin to formalize a union.Gift custom · Engagement and betrothal
🇰🇬 Kyrgyzstan and 2 moreAla kachuuала качуу
A Kyrgyz custom of taking a woman for marriage, ranging from consensual elopement to forced abduction.Betrothal · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇳 India and 1 moreMayian
The turmeric paste ceremony held the day before Punjabi weddings in India and Pakistan.Rite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaGaye holudগায়ে হলুদ
The turmeric ceremony that prepares the Bengali bride and groom for marriageRite · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaChaklong wedding
The traditional Ahom marriage system involving rice powder mandalas and ancestral rituals.Rite · Finding a match
🇸🇩 Khartoum, SudanJirtigالجَرْتِقْ (Arabic)
A Sudanese inauguration ritual where the groom is symbolically crowned as a king.Rite · The weeks before
🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 1 moreRèiteach
A Scottish Gaelic betrothal ceremony where families negotiate marriage terms and celebrate with whisky.Betrothal · Engagement and betrothal
🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 5 moreGroomsman
A male attendant who supports the groom and assists guests at a wedding.Family role · Finding a match
🇸🇿 EswatiniUmtsimbauntsimba
A multi-day Swazi wedding procession where the bride joins her husband's family through ritualised stages.Rite · Finding a match
🇳🇵 NepalIhiईही
The Newar rite in which a girl is married to Vishnu, shown by a golden figureRite · The weeks before
🇫🇮 Finland and 5 moreBanns of marriagekuulutukset avioliittoon (Finnish)
The public announcement of an impending marriage in church or town hall to allow for legal objections.Vow · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaIndian wedding invitationsNimantraṇa patra (निमन्त्रण पत्र)
Decorated cards sent to announce a marriage and invite guests to the celebration.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇮🇷 Tehran, Iran and 1 moreIranian weddingمراسم عروسی در ایران
A multi-stage ceremony rooted in Zoroastrianism and Islam that binds families through courtship, feasts, and sacred vowsRite · Finding a match
🇮🇳 IndiaSehraसेहरा (Hindi)
A floral or beaded veil tied to the groom's turban before he departs for the wedding ceremony.Attire · The weeks before
🇲🇷 Mauritania and 5 moreLeblouhالبلوح
The forced fattening of girls to improve their marriage prospects, a harmful practiceBetrothal · Finding a match
🇪🇬 Egypt and 1 moreWedding music
The songs and instruments that mark the arrival of the couple and set the mood for the celebration.Performance · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaKettu KalyanamTālikettukalyānam
A mock marriage ritual in Kerala that marked a girl as ready for real unions by tying a sacred thread.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇿🇦 South AfricaUkuthwalwa
A South African practice of abducting a woman for marriage, now largely illegal and contested.Betrothal · Finding a match
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Ihi: Dirghaman Chitrakar, Public domain, source
- Ala kachuu: Illus. in: Turkestanskii al'bom, chast' étnograficheskaia: ..., 1871-1, Public domain, source
- Jirtig: Alzain Mohammed, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Mayian: Rakzika, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Iranian wedding: Flickr.com user "avlxyz", CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Umtsimba: Cat7624, CC0, source
- Sehra: SynthContibutor, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Mantilla: Museu Valencià d'Etnologia, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Indian wedding invitations: Onef9day, CC BY 3.0, source
- Banns of marriage: After William Hemsley, CC0, source
- Baju Kurung: Ministry of Information official photographer, Public domain, source
- Groomsman: Jenny Mealing, CC BY 2.0, source
- Weddings in Mali: HawaG, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Tahtib: Yasser Elrasoul, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Wimpel: Wikipedia Loves Art participant " The_Grotto ", CC BY-SA 2.5, source
- Guérewol: Dan Lundberg, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Loutrophoros: Picture taken by Marcus Cyron, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Kenduri: Andreasprasetya, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Maithil Vivah: Sntshkumar750, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Mizuhiki: User:FA2010, Public domain, source
- Mayoon: katorisi, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Alpana: Tripan123, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Ukuthwalwa: Federal Bureau of Investigation, Public domain, source
- Tulasi Vivah: Unknown author, CC BY 3.0, source
- Rushnyk: Pavlo Boyko, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Aso ebi: SUPREME LACE, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Palang pintu: Gunawan Kartapranata, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Zuria: Kurt Bauschardt, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Gele: Royalesignature, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Weddings in ancient Rome: Meister der Aldobrandinischen Hochzeit, Public domain, source
- Oppana: Shagil Kannur, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Black Day: by 아침꿀물 at Flickr, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Huipil: Gift in memory of Elizabeth Ege Freudenheim, No restrictions, source
- Bride price: Пимоненко Николай Корнилиевич, Public domain, source
- Chaklong wedding: Chiring chandan, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Gaye holud: Arr4, CC BY-SA 4.0, source