The weeks before
Invitations, the trousseau, the bridal shower, the bachelor night and the purifying baths.
The weeks before a wedding are a time of preparation: invitations, tailoring, shopping, cleaning the house, cooking and gathering family. Many cultures have rites in this period, from the bridal shower to purifying baths, and they are often held among women or among friends.
Invitations and gifts
Invitations range from printed cards to the traditional Indian practice of first inviting the deity Ganesha and then the family in person with sweets. In Ethiopia and many Arab families, relatives are invited verbally and in person. In parts of China, the groom's family sends cakes and tea to relatives. The trousseau is assembled, and in India and Pakistan a shopping trip for gold, cloth and gifts may take weeks.
Showers, stag nights and baths
Western brides may have a hen party and a bridal shower, and grooms a bachelor party or stag night. In Morocco and the Levant the bride visits the hammam with female relatives for a ritual bath. In Hindu tradition haldi and oil are applied. In Scotland the bride's friends may have a kitchen tea, and in Poland the panieński, the maiden evening, is held before the wedding.
What is changing
Pre-wedding events have expanded, with engagement shoots, destination bachelorette trips and multi-day celebrations. Many families now plan with shared online documents. Others scale back because of cost and keep only the core rite.
Written by the EveryShaadi desk with AI assistance. Background on The weeks before (stage of the wedding). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇬🇷 Greece and 2 moreEngagement party
A gathering to announce a new engagement and introduce the two families before the wedding.Betrothal · Engagement and betrothal
🇮🇳 IndiaKettu KalyanamTālikettukalyānam
A mock marriage ritual in Kerala that marked a girl as ready for real unions by tying a sacred thread.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 5 moreWedding superstitions
Traditional beliefs about luck and omens that shape wedding rituals across culturesAttire · The weeks before
🇮🇳 IndiaIndian wedding clothes
Traditional garments worn by Indian couples and guests across multiple days of celebrationAttire · The weeks before
🇻🇳 VietnamTraditional Vietnamese weddingLễ cưới truyền thống Việt Nam
The multi-stage ceremony of betrothal, engagement and union that marks a marriage in Vietnam.Attire · Finding a match
🇺🇸 Austin, United States and 5 moreBachelorette party
A pre-wedding gathering for the bride-to-be and her female friends, known as a hen party in many Commonwealth nations.Performance · The weeks before
🇮🇱 IsraelKallahYarchei Kallah (Hebrew: ירחי כלה)
A biannual gathering for Torah study and marriage law held by Babylonian Jewish scholars in Adar and Elul.Betrothal · The weeks before
🇳🇵 Nepal and 2 moreKhata
A ceremonial scarf offered to show respect and welcome at weddings and other gatherings in Tibet and Nepal.Adornment · Reception, dance and gifts
🇮🇪 Ireland and 3 moreBachelor's Day
The custom that lets women propose to men on Leap DayBetrothal · Engagement and betrothal
🇰🇪 Kenya and 1 moreAyie
The Luo bride price ceremony where the mother accepts payment and agrees to the marriage.Gift custom · Engagement and betrothal
🇷🇴 Romania and 4 moreCălușariCălușarii
A traditional Romanian spring dance and male society known for acrobatic leaps and ritual healing.Performance · The weeks before
🇬🇷 Greece and 1 moreAnastenariaΑναστενάρια (Greek), Нестинарство (Bulgarian)
A barefoot firewalking ritual performed by Orthodox Christian communities in Greece and Bulgaria.Rite · The weeks before
🇺🇦 Ukraine and 7 moreVechornytsiвечорниці
A Ukrainian courtship gathering where young people meet, dance and practice matchmaking rituals before the wedding seasoBetrothal · The weeks before
🇰🇷 Jeju, South KoreaJeju Chilmeoridang Yeongdeunggut제주 칠머리당영등굿
A Jeju Island shaman ritual welcoming the goddess of the sea with horse-head posts and lanterns at the Korean New Year.Blessing · The weeks before
🇮🇳 Madurai, IndiaGoluBommai kolu (Tamil), Bommala Koluvu (Telugu), Gombe Habba (Kannada)
A tiered display of dolls and figurines arranged in South Indian homes during the Navaratri festival.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇵🇱 Poland and 5 moreTuroń
A horned effigy that visits homes during Carnival to wish for fertility and collect gifts.Blessing · The weeks before
🇮🇩 IndonesiaSlametan
A communal Javanese feast that brings neighbors together for peace and social unity.Feast custom · The weeks before
🇳🇿 Wellington, New ZealandMarriage (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Act 2013
The 2013 New Zealand law that changed the legal definition of marriage to include same-sex couples.Vow · The weeks before
🇦🇺 Australia and 5 moreCelebrancy
A profession of secular officiants who create personalised life ceremonies for people outside traditional religious or sModern · The weeks before
🇵🇭 Cebu, PhilippinesCourtship in the Philippines
A traditional Filipino courtship marked by serenade, service, and family involvement.Betrothal · Finding a match
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Courtship in the Philippines: Markytour777, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Engagement party: Melissa Gupta, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Wedding superstitions: Anonymous Unknown author, Public domain, source
- Indian wedding clothes: Lee Jordan, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Traditional Vietnamese wedding: Gabrielle M. Vassal, Public domain, source
- Bachelorette party: Michael Vincent Photography for Bride's Night Out, Inc., CC BY 3.0, source
- Anastenaria: Artkostov, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Golu: Ksiva21, CC BY-SA 4.0, source
- Khata: Wiki-uk, CC BY 3.0, source
- Ayie: SteveRwanda, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Călușari: El bes, CC BY 3.0, source
- Vechornytsi: Гейслер, Кристиан Готфрид Генрих, Public domain, source
- Turoń: Museum: The Seweryn Udziela Ethnographic Museum in Kraków, CC0, source
- Jeju Chilmeoridang Yeongdeunggut: by karendotcom127, CC BY 2.0, source
- Slametan: Unknown author, CC BY-SA 3.0, source